With Open Eyes
by dustybritches01
Summary: Edward Cullen returns home at Christmas to face his past and to see if there is a chance for a future with the girl he left behind. Written for the Naughty or Nice Contest. Beta'ed by Mr. DB. Stephanie Meyers owns Twilight.
1. Chapter 1

With Open Eyes

Chapter One

Weary with road fatigue, Edward Cullen pulled over just outside of town. With his headlights illuminating the Covington, Georgia welcome sign, he stepped out of his truck and flipped up his collar against the winter chill.

Fear and excitement raced through his veins as he leaned against the hood of his red rebuilt 1949 Dodge Power Wagon.

Auntie Esme would be glad to see him for Christmas—that made him smile.

Chief Swan—not so much—that thought made his stomach drop.

" _You messed up big time, boy," Charlie Swan had said as he removed the handcuffs from Edward's wrists. "We got you and your cousin dead to rights on possession with the intent to distribute and drunk driving. You're going to leave this town and my daughter, or I'll see to it that the charges fall directly on you instead of your shit cousin. Do I make myself clear?"_

" _I love her, sir," Edward had whispered past the lump in his throat as he rubbed his wrists._

 _Chief Swan had laughed. "Oh, Bella'll cry and pine for a bit, but she'll get over you and move onto better."_

Bella Swan, the sweetest girl he'd ever known—well, that just made his heart race.

After eight years, he was coming home to make things right with those he loved and rebuild his life. His face hardened with determination. He spat to the side and glanced one more time at the sign before climbing into his truck and rolling into town.

…

As he sauntered up the drive of the sprawling Tudor home, the front door flew open spilling light across the lawn.

"Edward!"

Edward found himself engulfed in Aunt Esme's warm embrace before he reached the porch steps.

"Hey, Auntie."

She squeezed tighter, and he glanced over her shoulder to see Uncle Carlisle step onto the porch.

"Welcome back, son."

Edward kissed Esme's temple and wrapped his arm around her shoulders as he led her up the steps and grasped Carlisle's outstretched hand.

"Thank you, sir. It's great to be back."

He was ushered into a warm room glowing with a glittering tree and a crackling fire.

"Sit," Esme said as she took his coat and propelled him toward the loveseat along the wall.

Carlisle sat on the couch across from Edward and held his arm out for Esme to sit next to him.

Edward took a deep breath and waited as they grinned at him.

Finally, he relaxed back and crossed his ankle over his knee. "So we're okay?" he asked as he looked from one to the other.

Esme patted Carlisle's thigh, and Carlisle gave her shoulder a squeeze.

"Son, if it were up to me, you never would have left. It was an injustice to treat you in that manner. You promise never to put us in that position again, and we are good as gold."

Edward nodded and swallowed against the lump in his throat. "Thank you, sir. Getting into that car with my cousin is my greatest regret."

"We know, son," Carlisle said and slapped his leg. "The past is the past. Let's celebrate ."

Esme hopped up, returned with a tray of wine glasses and passed them out. Carlisle lifted his flute to Edward. "To homecomings and new beginnings."

"To homecomings," Esme agreed.

"To new beginnings, thank you," Edward said to his aunt and uncle as he took a sip of the delicate white wine, not his cup of tea but very Esme.

Esme wrapped her arms around Edward's slender waist. "I have dinner in the oven let's go to the kitchen, and I'll get it on the table."

Edward felt Carlisle's arm rest across his shoulders as the trio walked to the large kitchen. Breathing in his aunt's home cooking, He smiled at how good it felt to be home.

…

Mischief, an orange tabby, meandered under an azalea bush after a grasshopper while Bella worked at wrapping Christmas lights around the front porch posts of the frame house her Grandma Swan had left her. Mischief, sensing a tete-a-tete, sat on the rock between the bushes and wrapped his tail around his feet.

Bella picked up a new strand of lights and worked a knot before she began the conversation. "Angela said Edward Cullen came into the diner for pie and coffee." She cut her eyes to see if her cat was casting judgment. When Mischief narrowed his eyes for her to continue, Bella sat on the step and rubbed under the cat's chin. "I just want him to be happy. I knew when he left I didn't make him happy. How could I? It would have meant tying him to this one horse town." She threw the strand back in the box and leaned against the porch railing.

" _You'll call me?"_

" _Yeah, baby, eleven thirty and one ring."_

 _She'd smiled shyly, "Okay,"—kiss—"I'll talk…"—kiss—"…to you soon." –kiss._

 _He'd never called._

 _At school the next day she found out his aunt had withdrawn him from school and he had left town. Her dad had been supportive telling her it was for the best. She'd see—but she never did._

 _Edward was gone._

"Edward was too bright a star to be extinguished here," Bella sighed.

Mischief rubbed along her arm in commiseration and Bella grinned at her friend. She pulled a faded azalea off a bush and tossed it onto the grass smiling as Mischief attacked it. With a determined huff, Bella returned to her work.

She worked until the sun was dropping below the limbs of her live oak. She stood and surveyed the front of the house and nodded with satisfaction before patting her thigh.

"Bo. Jangles. Y'all come on." Two chocolate labs bounded from their spot under a peach tree. They followed her up the steps of the wide porch and into the eat-in kitchen where she poured herself an ice tea and grabbed three cookies.

She and her entourage retired to the back porch, and she wrapped herself in a throw on the swing before dropping two cookies in front of her dogs.

She took a bite of her cookie and looked out over the peaceful garden. The sunlight slanted through the live oak and pecan trees toward the back of the property creating a checkered pattern across the yellowed lawn and sleeping raised beds.

Bella rocked lazily rubbing her foot along the prostrate form of Bo and finished her cookie lost in memories of strong arms and soft kisses—loving words and misplaced wishes.


	2. Chapter 2

With Open Eyes

Chapter Two

"It's damn good to have you here, bro."

Edward looked up from the carburetor he was wrestling. "It's good to be back, Em. I'm excited to get Ernie's old shop up and running again."

Emmett McCarty wiped his greasy hands on a rag. "It's a dream come true. Couldn't have bought it without your help."

"What we've dreamed of since high school. Esme and Carlisle are happy to see me home and setting down roots."

"Emmett gave his friend a broad grin. "Partners."

"Hell yeah." Edward smacked his old friend on the back as a movement across the street caught his eye.

Two dogs pulled a smiling Bella Swan down the sidewalk. Edward stepped to the garage door to enjoy the view and felt Emmett behind him.

"You're not going to open that old can of worms, are you?" Emmett huffed.

"Bella's no 'can of worms,' Em."

"Local authorities will have something to say if you get mixed up with the Swan girl again."

"Charlie Swan has nothing but words and I've heard them all."

Emmett shrugged and tucked his head back under the hood of a Silverado, but Edward's eyes remained trained on the vision passing before him.

He noted how she had changed—more curves and shorter hair. Watching the way she walked bouncing on the balls of her feet, greeting everyone she passed, he grinned wistfully at how very the same she seemed.

" _Oh Eddie, you were so great!" Bella batted her eyes and squeezed his bicep. "Oh, you're so big and strong." She fell over on the bed giggling hysterically while the tips of his ears burned._

 _He shrugged, uncomfortable that she wouldn't let go of Lauren's ridiculous attention after the game. "Shut up," he said with a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth as he lay down beside her._

 _She rolled and placed her hand on his chest looking down at him with round earnest eyes and said, "You were great, Edward, that last shot won the game. I was so proud of you."_

 _That's what he'd wanted to hear. He'd do anything to make Bella proud of him, to not be ashamed to be with him._

" _Thanks, baby," he murmured and pulled her down for a kiss._

 _She came to his lips willingly but pulled back too soon. "Lauren Mallory has started an Eddie Cullen fan club, I'm sure of it." She grinned and rubbed her nose along his, while her breath on his skin did funny things to him._

" _You gonna be the president of my fan club, baby?" he asked as his lips slid down her neck, tasting._

 _She sat up and reached for her shoes, "I'm not much of a joiner. I guess I'll just worship you from afar."_

 _She stood, and he grabbed her hand making her look at him. "Bella, nobody gets between us. It's you and me. Lauren Mallory can stuff it like she does her bras."_

 _She barked a laugh. "She really does you know."_

 _He scooted to the edge of the bed and drew her to stand between his legs. "It's what I hear. We okay, Bella?"_

 _She gave him a resigned smile and ran her fingers through his hair. "I love your hair," she whispered._

 _He captured her hand and kissed her palm._

" _I love you, baby," he whispered back._

 _She leaned down to kiss him._

 _He moved to pull her onto his lap, but she hesitated._

" _I gotta go. Dad's gonna be home in an hour or so," she said with sad eyes begging him to understand._

 _He sighed, "Yeah, Charlie."_

" _You'll call me?"_

 _He watched her chew her lip, unsure of his answer. Didn't she get it? He said he loved her. He'd go to the moon and back for her._

" _Yeah, baby, eleven thirty and one ring."_

 _She smiled shyly, "Okay,"—kiss—"I'll talk…"—kiss—"…to you soon." –kiss._

 _She pulled away with a sigh, and he listened to her bounce down the stairs, out to her truck. After three tries to get it going, she was heading down his street and gone._

 _James had called an hour later. With time to kill until eleven-thirty, he'd gone with his cousin to a party._

As Bella disappeared from view, his heart tugged to follow her. Edward forced himself back to the carburetor. "What's Bella like now?"

Emmett groaned. "Ah, you know, married with kids."

Edward's head hit the hood. "Married with kids! Who?"

Emmett had mercy on his friend. "Nah, she never married—lives in her grandma's old house on Oak Street." Relief washed over Edward's face, so Emmett added. "But I see her around with Newton a bit, and Jacob Black has staked a claim on her too." Edward looked up from his work to see Emmett's goofy grin. "It's too easy to mess with 'ya when it comes to the Swan girl."

"Bella. Her name is Bella."

…

"Up Bo." The worried look on her sweet old lab had Bella lifting him into the cab of the truck with a grunt. Jangles hopped up next to his buddy and Bella blew a strand of hair from her face before slamming the heavy door.

The Holiday Festival on Main Street was always a big event. Everyone came out for the music and food.

Bo curled up under Bella's table. Its red tablecloth, overlaid with sheer gold lace, blocked the drafts from his old bones. Jangles sat smiling outside the booth waiting for people to visit him as she set up her wares. Bella had evergreen wreaths, Mason jar candles, and canned goods from her gardens and orchard—along with mistletoe sprigs she and the dogs had collected from the forest north of town.

She smiled as a police cruiser slowed in front of her. Her dad stepped out, giving Jangles a loving pat. "Looks like you're ready."

"Yeah, it's going to be a beautiful night, crisp but not too cold."

"You stay warm. I'll be by with some hot chocolate from Sue's diner later."

She gave her dad a big squeeze. "That would be great. See you in a bit."

Back in the car, Charlie lowered his window. "Sue said to set aside two of the bayberry candles." He wrinkled his nose making her laugh.

"I will."

Once music from the stage at the top of the street filled the air, the road filled with people. Bella was busy with the steady stream of people flowing past her stand.

"He's been watching from across the street."

Bella looked up to find Alice grinning as she turned a jar of chow-chow in her hands.

Bella passed three Christmas tree cookies to Jasper pushing the double stroller before looking at her friend. "Who?"

"Edward Cullen, of course. Jasper and I have a bet going on how long it'll take him to get up the nerve to talk to you."

Bella forced herself not to look. "So what's the bet?"

"I say he'll spend half the night mooning before he finally makes a move. Jasper seems to think he'll be over any minute now."

Bella took the chow-chow away from Alice only to watch her pick up a candle. "So what are the stakes?"

Alice wiggled her eyebrows and laughed as Bella blushed and snatched the mason jar out of her hand. "Stop fingering my wares, Alice." A choking cough from Jasper had the women laughing. "Take your dirty-minded husband and shoo."

Sorry Bella," Jasper murmured as he sucked on a pink flowered tippy cup and wiped crumbs from his jacket.

Alice stretched over the table for a hug. "Give him a chance, Bee."

Bella gave her friend's pixie cut a tug. "Love you. Come back by for the raffle."

Jasper tucked his wife, with her mischievous grin, under his arm as she took over pushing the twins to the next booth.

Alice's words played on her mind as Bella rubbed Bo's ears and Jangles hoovered the crumbs Jasper and the kids had dropped. She strived for casual as she scanned the booths across the street, but her heart gave a jolt when she found him buying a cinnamon bun from the United Methodists' booth.

He was taller than she recalled. His shoulders were broader and his chiseled jaw was more defined, but just as beautifully perfect as she remembered.

She gave him a little wave feeling foolish at how her heart raced when he waved back. She gave herself a shake and busied herself with restocking the table.

The night was winding down, and booths were closing when she looked up to see him making his way across the street. Looking at her watch, she mumbled, "Jasper better bring his A-game when Alice comes to collect." She grimaced at the thought of Alice reliving her victory next Saturday over coffee.

"Hi."

There he was—the handsome ghost of her Christmas past.

Bella felt her cheek heat. "Hi."

Edward let Jangles sniff his hand. "I saw you walking two dogs the other day."

She smiled as Jangles angled his head for Edward to rub his ears. "Ah-yeah, Bo is under the table keeping my feet warm. That's Jangles. He's never met a stranger. Um, I heard you were visiting. Carlisle and Esme must be glad."

"Yeah, they are, but I'm moving back. Emmett McCarty and I are going to be partners running Ernie's old shop."

She fiddled with the bow on the last wreath. "Moving back, huh?"

"Ah-yeah." He ran a finger along the ribbon of a mistletoe sprig. "I'm looking forward to seeing you around."

She felt his words run up her spine and tickle in long forgotten places making her heart race.

She looked up to see hope in his eyes. "Ah—I'd like that—you seeing me around."

His smile was brilliant. "I'd like that too," he took a step back. "So—I'll see you soon, Bella Swan."

She tucked her hair behind her ear and focused on breathing. "Okay, see you soon Edward Cullen."

She stood still, watching his retreat, trying with little success to rein in her heart.


	3. Chapter 3

With Open Eyes

Chapter Three

After a sleepless night, Edward knew where to find Bella on a Sunday morning. He was dressing with shaking hands as promises of waffles and coffee wafted up the staircase.

He bounced down the stairs toward breakfast and family voices but slowed as he picked up the tenor of the conversation.

"It's sweet that he was talking with her last night."

"I just don't want any trouble for the boy."

"Carlisle, let him follow his heart."

"Es, the last time he followed his heart that Chief Jackass ran him out of town on a rail. He doesn't need to go down that road again."

"That's not fair."

Edward stepped into the room. "No, auntie, he's right. I gave Charlie Swan the ammunition he needed to get me away from Bella." He turned to his uncle. "But don't think for a moment, Bella Swan had anything to do with what happened that night. I made bad choices and paid for it, and yes, Charlie Swan is a Chief Jackass."

Esme laughed and turned to pour Edward a coffee as Carlisle smiled and pushed out a chair. "Point well made. Bella has always been a sweet girl. I just think it might go easier for you if you widened your search a bit. There are a lot of pretty girls in this town."

"I'm not searching, Uncle Carlisle." Edward said as Esme sat down next to her husband, and then mumbled into his coffee, "I just want to get the shop up and running and get on with my life."

Esme patted the table. "Let's change the subject. Are you going to church with us?" she asked as her eyes roamed over his dress shirt and Dockers.

"Ah, no, I thought I'd visit another church this morning, but I'll meet up with you at Walden's after services."

Carlisle shook his head. "Let me guess; you're feeling a Baptist spirit this morning."

Edward took a long gulp of coffee and tried to school his face as a current of excitement course through him. Edward was walking into this with open eyes. Time hadn't dimmed what he felt for Bella. He just needed to see if there was anything left in Bella's heart for him.

…

Edward stood outside First Baptist Church with his hat in his hands and his heart pounding.

The singing had already started as he took unsure steps down the only aisle of the small church. He found an empty seat about midway, slid in, and pulled a hymnal out of the rack only to look up into the dark eyes of Charlie Swan.

He opened the hymnal and stared without seeing words as the weight of a room of curious looks bore down on him.

Just as he was getting ready to grab his coat and bolt, the song ended, and the congregation sat. He moved with them and tried to breathe as he settled into his pew.

"… a son of Covington returned home, Edward Cullen."

Edward looked up to see the pastor smiling from the pulpit as all heads swiveled his way. "It's good to see you again, son. Your Uncle and Aunt have been dear friends to my family and me. I know they're thrilled to have you home for the holidays."

Edward nodded and tried to ignore the weight of the stares. "Thank you, sir."

"Y'all make him feel welcome. Now Jim, let's have another song."

As the congregation stood to the introduction to " _O Come All Ye Faithful_ ," Edward found Bella in the choir loft. She smiled brightly and waved with one finger from behind her hymnal. He smiled back forgetting there was another living soul in the room.

After the service, people welcomed him before heading to their family dinners. Edward milled about as long as he could but gave up on seeing Bella and pulled his keys from his pocket as he made his way down the front steps.

"Edward!"

He turned in time to see Bella flying down the sidewalk toward him.

He caught her by the upper arms to stop her from running past him.

"Bella, you okay?" he laughed.

Panting, she ran a hand through her hair and glanced around. "Dad said you'd already left, so I didn't hurry with cleaning up the nursery. Alice told me you might still be here."

He ran his hands down her arms before dropping them to his side. "I'm sorry you rushed, but I'm glad you wanted to. I waited for as long as I could."

"I was so glad to see you come through those doors. You never wanted to come to church before."

"I know. I'm sorry for that. There's a lot that's changed about me." He took a step closer. "I'd like to get to know you again, Bella. I'd like you to get to know me."

"If you're moving back, we'll have time," she said as she tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"No time like the present. Do you have lunch plans? I'm meeting my aunt and uncle at Walden's. Would you like to come with me?"

"I don't know. Things were a bit strained between them and me after you left. I don't want to impose."

He hung his head for a moment. "Bella, I'm sorry for how my actions affected you. I'm sure my family never held anything against you. There's a lot I need to say, but right now, I just want your company and some catfish. They'll be glad to see you. I promise."

"Bella, you ready?"

Edward turned to see Charlie Swan making his way across the front lawn of the church and took a step back. It pleased him to no end when she moved with him to keep the distance between them static.

"Dad, I'm going to lunch with the Cullens."

Edward could have kissed the girl right then and there. He turned and held his hand out. "Mr. Swan."

Charlie ignored the proffered hand. "Bella, Sue is expecting us."

She took a step closer to Edward with a laugh. "I'm sure she's got the flat screen and recliner all warmed up for you, so you go on."

"Mr. Swan." Edward nodded and turned to follow Bella to the gravel parking lot.

…

"This your truck?" Bella asked.

Edward opened the passenger's door for her. "Yes ma'am, restored it myself in my cousin's shop in Fairbanks."

Bella stepped up into the cab and tucked her skirt around her knees. "Is that where you went—to Alaska?"

He climbed in next to her and started the engine. "Yeah, I went up to Fairbanks and worked in my uncle's shop while I finished high school. It's a 1949," he said as he patted the dashboard.

Her questioning frown melted into a shy smile as she ran her hands over the leather upholstery. "It's beautiful. You did a great job."

His face lit up with that shy-pride she remembered as he said, "Thanks."

Carlisle and Esme stood from the table as Edward lead Bella to their table. She tried not to show her nervousness as Carlisle greeted her. When Esme hugged her, she wanted to cry with relief.

They were gracious and kind making Bella feel welcome as conversation flowed.

Edward was relaxed and charming with his family. The pang of old grief for the loss of the Cullen's favor after Edward left washed over her, but she determined not to allow it to overshadow the joy of sitting next to Edward and being accepted into their seeming good graces again.

…

"Can I see you again?" Edward asked when they returned to the church.

Bella looked up with surprise in her chocolate eyes. He'd forgotten how tiny she was and wanted to wrap his arms around her to see if she felt the same.

"Uh—yes."

Relief washed over him. "Good—um—when?"

She smiled at his awkwardness, and he had to grin back. "How about Thursday evening. You could come over, and I could make us dinner. I know Jangles would be glad to see you again."

"Thursday, that's a long time to wait, but I'd never pass up a home-cooked meal."

He opened her truck door and they stood still with the door between them as she ran her finger over the rubber trim of the window. "Good—six work for you?"

He ran his finger gently over hers causing it to freeze. "Six would be just enough time to get cleaned up. Uh—can I get your number?"

"Um—sure." She dug into her purse and handed him her phone. He saved the numbers before returning it to her.

"Be careful going home and I'll see you Thursday." She hesitated long enough for his hand to reach out and gently tug a glossy strand of her chestnut hair. "Thank you, Bella, for today."

"I'm glad you're back, Edward," she said as her cheeks took on a rosy hue, and she placed her warm hand on his arm before climbing into her truck and starting the rattling engine.

He closed the door and waved through the window as she pulled away. "Lord, I can't wait to get my hands on that truck." The idea of working on Bella's truck, taking care of her, did funny things to him.

…

 **Sunday night**

 _ **E: Thank you again for today.**_

 _ **B: I enjoyed seeing you again.**_

 **Monday**

 _ **E: Is it Thursday yet?**_

 _ **B: No, maybe we forgot to wind our clocks.**_

 **Tuesday**

 _ **E: Emmett wants to know why I'm smiling so much. Should I tell him because I get to see you again?**_

 _ **B: Probably not. His wife, Rose has hated me since high school.**_

 _ **E: I'm sorry, consider the source. She hates everyone. Most days she can barely tolerate Em.**_

 _ **B: Thanks and I'm smiling too.**_

 **Wednesday**

 _ **E: Tell Jangles I'm really looking forward to seeing him again.**_

 _ **B: LOL He's wagging his tail at the thought of seeing you again.**_

 **Thursday**

 _ **E: I'm on your porch with flowers and a smile.**_


	4. Chapter 4

_With Open Eyes_

 _Chapter Four_

 _ **E: I'm on your porch with flowers and a smile.**_

Bella read the text as she fiddled with an earring and rushed to the door. She paused for just a moment to admire the silhouette of broad shoulders framed in her screen door and forced herself to calm down.

"Hi," she said as she opened the screen door.

His smile seemed to reflect hers as he handed her a pot of rose-colored poinsettias. "Hi."

"They're lovely," she said as she set them on a table near her porch window. "Come on in."

He wiped his feet as he entered and hung his coat on the coat rack near the door.

"This was always a sweet place when Grandma Swan was alive. I'm glad you've kept it." She watched his eyes roam over the floors that had been sanded and refinished, the once yellowed walls she had spackled and painted in a warm cream, and the woven rugs she had made that defined the dining and seating areas. "You've done a lot."

She smiled, pleased that he approved, and motioned for him to follow her to the kitchen. "I'm whittling at it as I have money and time."

She pointed to the kitchen table before turning her attention back to dinner. She could feel him watching her every movement.

She cleared her throat. "How was your day?"

"I worked on Matt Olson's car. It needed a new brake job. How was your day?"

She stirred the green beans before answering. "I work part-time at the elementary school library, and today, we had a reading circle for the kindergarten and first graders. I read _Polar Express_ and _Bear Stays Up for Christmas_. I love all the Bear stories— _Bear Snores On; Bear Wants More_ —they're great."

She knew she was rambling, but it felt good to talk, to have someone listen.

"I'd like to hear you read all of the Bear stories."

The tender tenor of his voice stilled her hands for a moment. She took a breath and continued to turn the pork chops in the cast iron frying pan. "Maybe someday."

Silence lay thick between them as the air of the domestic scene swirled and filled them with longing.

Edward cleared his throat. "Can I help? I've been fending for myself for some time."

That struck a chord with her, and she shut the cabinet door hard. "Where have you been for the past eight years?"

She heard him take a deep breath and hold it. She stirred the sawmill gravy and waited.

"Okay, I guess it's time to talk about it."

She whirled to face him flinging gravy against the refrigerator. "It's past time—about eight years past."

He didn't look at her as he grabbed a kitchen towel off the counter and wiped the fridge. "You're right. Serve up dinner, and we'll talk. Fair?"

She turned back to the stove with her heart racing. "Fair enough."

…

Edward stared at his knife as it spread butter across his biscuit and felt her heartache pressing down on him. "That night, James wanted me to ride along with him to a party out in Belmont."

She took a sip of her sweet tea and waited for more. Edward squared his shoulders and continued.

"James was taking pills and joints to the party, and your dad pulled us over. It gave him the leverage he needed to separate us. I was let off with a warning if I went to live with my Uncle Eleazar and Aunt Carmen in Alaska. I sat in Carlisle's study watching him explain my screw up to Uncle Eleazar, and then I had to listen to Aunt Esme cry at the foot of my bed while I packed. I wasn't allowed to call Charlie Swan's daughter to explain. Uncle Carlisle drove me to the airport in the morning, and I was in the air while you were in homeroom."

A tear rolled down her cheek and hesitated on her chin before dropping to the tablecloth. She cleared her throat. "Why didn't you call, write when you got there? Something?"

He gave up trying to eat and took her hand to lead her into the living room. He sat on the slipcovered sofa and pulled her down next to him. He pulled his leg up to rest between them and turned to face her.

"Bella, your dad told Carlisle he had evidence with my fingerprints on it. If I contacted you in any way, he would reopen the case, and I would have charges brought against me. James did eight months as an adult. Carlisle wasn't going to let me have that fate. I had hurt them so much already. I couldn't go against him. After a while, I figured you had moved on."

She picked at a loose thread on a throw on the arm of the couch. "My dad did all that?"

"Bella, your dad has always resented me. I made mistakes that night, for sure, but I was a kid."

She leaned her head against the back of the couch and looked at him. "I missed you."

His eyes glistened, "I missed you too—so much."

"Why would you think I would move on?"

Edward looked away to keep the bitter pain from showing.

"Edward?"

He swallowed thickly against the lump in his throat. "You never said it."

She frowned. "Said what?"

He shook his head and looked at Bo lying by the tree—such a sweet old guy.

"Edward?"

Edward closed his eyes. "Bella, how many times, how many ways did I tell you I loved you?"

She stared at the string on the throw. "Oh."

He gritted his teeth and forced out the words that wrapped around his heart like a vice, "You never once said it back."

Bella leaned back as if slapped. "And you left me. I knew you would. You were always talking about traveling, leaving."

"Bella …"

Silence fell between them as the wounds of the past lay open.

She placed her hand on the cushion between them, and he wrapped his hand around hers.

"Why did you come back now?" she whispered.

He drew their joined hands onto his knee. "This town has always been where I wanted to be. It was like a mirage I could never reach. When Emmett asked me to partner with him in the shop, it gave me the way to come back, to come home." He scooted closer. "I'll tell you the truth, Bella. I came back to build a life here, in the town I love. But I also came back to make you a part of that life in any way you feel comfortable."

She leaned her head against his shoulder. "I missed you."

He wrapped his arm around her and drew her closer. "Did you love me, Bella?"

He felt her stiffen and play with his button. "Yes," she whispered.

"Do you think you could again?"

She nodded, and that was enough for now.

…

They sat wrapped around each other as the shadows of the room lengthened. Bella heard the whispered confession before she realized she was speaking.

"You know my mom left when I was seven."

He nodded and rubbed his hand down her arm.

"I didn't tell you—anybody—what happened before she left. Dad and Momma had been arguing for days. He would stomp around and slam doors, and she would cry and hug me until I had trouble breathing. The last night at dinner, Momma was trying not to cry over the meatloaf on her plate and all of the sudden Dad picked up his plate and threw it over our heads to shatter against the wall behind us. I felt a shard hit my arm and rubbed it as Dad stormed out of the house and roared off in his truck. I fell asleep with my mom crying in the next room and woke up with no one there to make breakfast."

"I'm sorry, baby," Edward whispered warmly against her hair.

She sat back to look him in the eye, and he wiped her tears away with his thumb. "I'm saying you are not the first person to leave me because my Dad hurt them."

Edward nodded and swallowed before tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I don't want you to ever hurt again, Bella. I want you happy. I want to be the one who makes you happy."

She melted against him and hugged him around his middle as she rested her head on his shoulder. "Coming back has made me happy, Edward."

When Edward's stomach growled, she laughed.

Leading him by the hand back to the kitchen, she warmed up the food, and they ate with sweet, hopeful glances. While she was making coffee to go with the cookies, Jangles kept Edward company. They took dessert out to the front porch to watch the snow fall in a lazy curtain. It would be gone by midday tomorrow, but it was beautiful to watch in the glow of the Christmas lights.

Edward and Bella snuggled under the throw, feeding bites of cookie to each other as Bo and Jangles lay at their feet enjoying a cookie of their own.

Cocooned in his warmth, Bella was drifting toward sleep when she felt his lips on her forehead. She leaned her head back in invitation. He ran his finger down her cheek before pressing his lips to hers. She ran her hand into his hair, and he angled to deepen the kiss.

One kiss more and he pulled back. "It's still there," he whispered.

She smiled. "It is still there."


	5. Chapter 5

With Open Eyes

Chapter Five

Saturday evening, Edward sat by the fire rubbing Bo's ears as his chin rested on Edward's knee and listened to Bella clatter around the kitchen talking to Jangles. It had been a perfect day. They had met for breakfast at the diner and had to contend with giggles and whispers from Sue and Angela as well as blatant stares from Jacob Black and his partner on the police force. Edward knew they would run back to tattle to the Chief, but when Bella reached across the table for his hand; he moved to her side of the booth, effectively putting his back to the town's meddling.

Bella took him antique shopping at Newton's Antiques and Stuff. For a very unassuming storefront, the antique mall took several hours to cover. Bella was in heaven, and he paid attention to the things she wistfully put back as she shopped for Charlie, Alice, and Sue and her kids. He found an art deco necklace for Esme and a 1918 medical journal for Carlisle. While Bella went to warm the truck, Edward bought Bella's Christmas present and arranged for its delivery.

"Dinner's on!"

The old dog groaned as Edward stood and stretched. As Bo huffed and collapsed near the fire's warmth, he rubbed his sock-covered foot along Bo's back. Edward stood just inside the kitchen and took a second to enjoy the scene before him. Bella was in sweatpants and a large sweatshirt with her hair piled high on her head. She was natural and beautiful to the point of painful. Bella had been herself with him all day making it easy for him to be himself. She was genuine and sweet. Thankfulness swelled in his chest for the second chance he'd been given with this girl as Bella danced to _Jingle Bell Rock_ with Jangles circling her and a perturbed cat looking on from his perch on the rocker in the corner.

After dinner, they took the dogs for a long walk and snuggled on her couch with a fire crackling in the fireplace. They talked about the time they'd missed with each other. After graduation, her Grandma Swan passed, and she had spent the last six years building up the house and five acres into a property that could sustain her. He found Bella quieter, more settled, but still beautiful inside and out.

Edward told her how he had worked with Uncle Eleazar and his cousin, Garrett to learn mechanics and had gone to college to study Automotive Mechanics. She said she was proud of him and he felt the words to his core.

Early in the morning, Edward said goodbye to a sleepy, toasty Bella and stepped into the cold winter chill alone but content. He found Aunt Esme drinking a mug of tea in the dimly lit kitchen. Over a warm cup of tea, he told her of the day, of the hopes the day gave him and smiled at her vibrating excitement for him in the tight hug she gave him before he climbed the stairs to bed.

…

By Christmas Eve morning the eight years seemed like a bad dream. Edward and Bella rode to church together with plans for pot roast at her house after the service and Christmas Eve with Esme and Carlisle in the evening.

As Bella joined the choir to warm up and prepare, Edward stepped outside to enjoy the crisp chill in the air.

"I saw your truck out at Bella's yesterday. What are you playing at, boy?"

Edward wheeled on his nemesis. "My name is Edward, Edward Cullen."

Charlie's eyebrows shot up. "Well, look who's putting on airs. Mighty far-reaching for a drug-pushing hood."

Edward's neck blazed as his anger spread through him. "I made one mistake as a kid. One 'wrong place at the wrong time' and you won't let me forget it. Will you, Swan?"

Edward braced himself as Charlie stepped closer. "That's Chief Swan to you and no I won't. You know why, boy? Once a bad seed, always a bad seed. You'll never amount to anything and you sure as hell will never be good enough for my daughter. She's better than the likes of you. You think you can make her happy. You'll do nothing but disappoint and hurt her."

Edward stepped away from the stinging words and took a deep breath. "Your opinion is not the one that matters." He held the man's gaze for a moment longer before turning his back and walking away.

As Edward entered the church, his eyes found Bella in the choir loft smiling and waving, which caused people to look and whisper. He didn't care. She was glad he was here, wanted him here.

Edward sauntered down the aisle taking a seat in front of Alice and Jasper who leaned across the pew to give him a hug and handshake. Charlie followed right behind and moved past him to sit in the second row as the organ music filled the room.

As the congregation stood with hymnals in hand, Edward looked up into the radiant smile of the girl—the woman he loved, would always love, and held her gaze as the room sang of the gentle birth of the Savior. He understood now why Carlisle and Esme had always cherished their time at church, sharing a hymnal, and blending their voices with like believers. He loved sharing this with Bella and the people she gathered around her, and for a moment he felt embraced, a part of something greater.

The congregation sat as the choir took their places. As they sang, Edward's eyes stayed glued to Bella. He could see himself walking into her mudroom at the end of a hard day's work. There'd be kids and dogs raising a ruckus while Bella called after them from her kitchen. His stomach would growl from the smells coming from her frying pan as he washed up before entering her neat little house. He'd be the luckiest man alive to come home to her for the rest of his days.

When Bella stepped forward and began to sing _O Holy Night,_ Edward's heart stopped in his chest. Under the soft glow of candlelight, she was beautiful. As her voice ebbed and flowed over the hushed room, Edward looked on in awe at the angelic being he had thought he had a right to claim. He looked down at the rough hands that would always have grease under their nails and saw the truth Charlie Swan had been spouting for ten years. Bella was good and strong, bright and giving. She deserved someone who could give her the world.

…

As Bella finished her solo and returned to the choir, she watched Charlie turn and level hard eyes on Edward. Edward's jaw twitched as he glared back. Bella's heart stopped cold when Edward's shoulders slumped, and he dropped his gaze.

Charlie faced forward in pious victory as the choir took their seats and Pastor Banner moved to the pulpit. Bella looked on in horrific disbelief when Edward grabbed his jacket and marched up the aisle, pushing through the back doors.

While Pastor Banner began his sermon, Bella bounded out of the choir loft and jumped from the platform to race up the aisle and hit the back doors.

She ran down the steps of the church kicking off her pumps as she moved across the thick, frozen grass. Picking up a shoe, she threw it at him, hitting Edward square between the shoulder blades.

"Don't you do it, Edward Cullen! Don't you dare run."

Edward turned to face her with tears in his eyes. "Bella, you deserve better than me." Edward took a step toward her and then growled and smacked his hat against his thigh in frustration at the sight of Charlie Swan crunching across the frozen lawn toward them.

"That's Charlie talking, not you, Edward Cullen, not you." She popped her hip out and leveled a look at the two thickest men she'd ever met. "Let's talk about better, Edward." She shot a glare at Charlie. "Dad, you might want to sit in on this one," she said before returning her eyes to her true target. "Looking in the mirror and seeing the aging with nothing to show for it, no love, no children, watching everyone else couple up and fill their lives with love and meaning, while I go home to a book and a cold bed," she threw her hands in the air, "fixing eggs for my dogs to have someone to cook for, reading out loud just to hear a voice in my house," her shoulders drooped, "and living daily with the knowledge that tomorrow will be an exact copy of the day before." She looked at the two stone figures before her. "Now you tell me, is that better?" Her face collapsed in disappointment. "Is that what I deserve?"

Charlie stood frozen as if seeing his grown daughter for the first time, but Edward had her in his arms in two broad steps.

He picked her up and set her bare feet on his work boots as she buried her face in his jacket. "Shhh, baby, shhh. You'll have to do a hell of a lot more than making a scene in front of the whole congregation to get rid of me."

She sniffed, and he gave her a squeeze before she pulled back to see the church porch full of curious on-lookers.

"Ah shit," she moaned against his chest while he vibrated with laughter. "Sorry Pastor," she called over her shoulder.

"That's all right, Bella. Goodwill toward men, you know," Pastor Banner said, and a porch full of laughter followed.

She smacked Edward's shoulder. "Shut up and get me out of here."

He kept his arms wrapped around her. "You want me, Bella?"

She smacked his arm again. "Yes, damn you."

He grinned and said, "Then I'm yours for as long as you want me, baby," before kissing her soundly in front of her world to the sound of applause and whistles. "Get her shoes, will ya', Charlie," Edward called over his shoulder while he walked her off the lawn riding on his boots.

Bella giggled into his collar, "I love you, you jackass."

He smiled against her hair. "Her first L-word, I'll take it."


	6. Chapter 6

With Open Eyes

Chapter Six

Edward was opening his truck door for Bella when Charlie caught up with them. She turned and moved around Edward to face her father.

Grabbing the shoes out of his hand, she pointed a heel at him. "We have a lot to talk about."

Charlie glared at Edward. "I don't like that delinquent back and sniffing around."

Bella raised her shoe at her dad. "Don't! You'll keep a civil tongue."

Edwards had taken hold of her throwing arm. "Bella put your shoes on." He wrapped his arm around her waist and encouraged her to lean on him while she slipped her impractical shoes onto her frozen feet.

Edward slipped his jacket over Bella's shoulders and ran his hands along her arms to warm her. Charlie looked on in disgust and spat on the ground. "He's no good for you …"

Bella stepped forward. "Enough. Charles Swan, we are going to sort this out because he's staying." Bella said with a nod to the man standing behind her.

Charlie shot death at Edward before dropping his head and shaking it against his daughter's words.

She crossed her arms over her chest. "Yes Dad, you are going to behave and have a rational adult conversation with me, or I'm calling Sue."

His head shot up. "Sue? What?"

"I think Sue would be very interested to know who she should be thanking for her Christmas present every year. Maybe she needs to be enlightened as to who is really eating her stuffing casserole. My god, that poor dog is so fat it can hardly move."

"You wouldn't …"

Bella pulled her phone out of her pocket.

Charlie's hands shot out. "Okay, okay, I'll try to be civil."

Bella nodded. "That's better. You're coming over to my house, but first, you're going through _Dunkin' Donuts_ and getting three coffees, I'm frozen solid."

Charlie looked from Bella to Edward and nodded before turning to head to his car. Bella stood watching her dad hunch his shoulders against the cold as he walked away from her.

"Baby, you're feet are freezing. Get in the truck and let's warm you up."

Bella turned to the man who cared about her frozen toes. "Thank you, Edward."

They rode in silence through the back streets toward her little frame house on the outskirts of town. Snow flurries drifted lazily across the windshield, and Edward turned on the wipers to a slow, comforting rhythm. Tucked into his truck with his jacket wrapped around her feet and legs, she felt cared for in a way she'd never known she missed.

Tears at the tenderness of one man and the premeditated hurt of another man stung her eyes. Edward wrapped his hand around the fist in her lap, gently coaxing it open. When she slid her fingers between his and squeezed back, he spoke, "Baby, you take the lead on this. I'll do whatever you need."

She nodded and cradled their joined hands in her lap. "This person you know, that perhaps my momma knew, I don't know him at all. He never raised his voice to me. He has always respected me, has always been in my corner." She sniffed and placed her hand on Edward's strong, reassuring hand and added, "Except when he wasn't. I see that now."

Edward lifted their joined hands to his lips, and she looked out the window at the gently falling snow.

…

Charlie moved cautiously into Bella's kitchen holding a tray of caffeinated appeasement.

Leaning against the counter with her arms crossed, she watched his eyes roam the room. "Edward's walking the dogs. Take off your coat and sit."

Her hip pushed away from the counter, and she took the cardboard tray. The scrape of a chair against the floor punctuated the tension in the room.

Bella placed a coffee in front of her dad before sitting across from him. She held the warmth of the cup for a moment before looking at the first man she ever loved. "I'm going to ask you questions, and you are going to answer me truthfully, Dad—no bullshit."

His eyes stayed trained on the coffee cup slowly turning in his hand. "Okay."

She took a sip. "I want to know why Momma left."

Charlie spilled his coffee on the table. "What the hell. Where did that come from?"

"I want to know …"

"I know what you said. Jesus! What does she have to do with that 'good for nothing' showing back up?"

"Roll back your attitude, Dad. Edward wasn't the first person to leave me. I want to understand this recurring theme in my life."

Charlie stood and paced behind his chair. "What do you want to know? That your mother was a cheating whore, who tried to take my daughter to Arizona?"

Bella set her cup on the table and sat back to keep from spilling her coffee. "She hurt you."

He stopped and looked at his daughter so much like her mother, beautiful and clever, and whispered, "She hurt you."

Bella nodded and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear before motioning for him to sit. "You both hurt me back then, but yeah, she did."

Charlie sat down and gulped his coffee. Bella got up and brought a plastic box of cookies to the table as the front door opened and a gust of chill ran through the house followed by the patter of the dogs' feet.

Edward hung the leashes and his coat and scarf on the coat tree before making his way into the kitchen.

Bella pushed the third coffee toward the chair next to her and Edward sat without looking at Charlie. Edward took her hand and frowned. "Your hands are like ice. Can I turn the heat up?"

She nodded. "It's on the wall by the bookcase in the living room."

Edward ran his hand along her shoulder as he left the room.

Charlie glared at the retreating form. "That boy's already dug in like a tick."

"Just stop, Dad. What you did to Edward and me…" she shook her head.

"What did that summabitch tell you?"

Edward returned with the throw from the couch and wrapped it around Bella before taking his seat next to her.

Charlie leaned across the table. "What kinda lies you feeding my girl?"

Edward took a deep breath and reached for Bella's hand under the blanket. "I told her what happened the night I left, my mistakes—and yours."

You're poisoning her against me. I won't have it."

"Dad, I-I think maybe the way you reacted with Edward was because of Momma. I think you didn't want him to hurt me like she did, and I think you didn't want him to take me away from you like she tried."

Charlie sat back and stared at his hands. Edward looked at Bella, and she shrugged with tears welling in her eyes.

After a moment of silence, Edward cleared his throat. "Sir, I can see the 'why' of your actions eight years ago. I don't agree with them, but I think it came from caring for Bella." Charlie's head shot up and Edward continued. "I came back because I love this town. I want to put down roots here, build a life here. And I want to make Bella happy for as long as she'll let me—here—in this town."

Charlie picked at a torn cuticle. "I don't like you, boy. Doubt I ever will."

Edward sat back and placed his arm behind Bella. "I'm just fine with that. I don't carry warm fuzzies for you either, but I think we can agree to love and care for Bella, to give her what makes her happy."

Charlie looked at his daughter and a pang hit his heart at her tear-streaked face. He swallowed thickly and nodded. "I could agree to that."

Bella sniffed and sighed deeply as she grabbed the cookies and pulled the lid off. "Was that so hard? You're both asses, but you're my asses, and I love you," she said as she held the tub in front of her dad. He took a handful, and she slid it to Edward and smiled. "Both of you."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Edward watched from the kitchen while Bella walked her dad to the door. Charlie buttoned his coat and reached for the doorknob, but she stilled his hand and made him look at her.

"Daddy, I love you, always have, always will." She reached up and tucked his scarf inside his collar. "What you did to Edward _hurt_ _me_."

Charlie dropped his head, and she wrapped her arms around his defeated torso. "I forgive you. That's what love does. It forgives."

Charlie nodded against her shoulder. "Thank you, B." he rasped.

She kissed his cheek and let him pull back. "If you want to make it up to me, you could make an effort to see what I see in Edward."

He grimaced. "More like penance if you ask me."

She smiled. "See you tomorrow."

Charlie glanced toward the kitchen. "Good, Sue's going to be over about 11:00."

"K, see you then. Drive safe."

"Will do." He looked toward the kitchen once more and cleared his throat. "Ah, Goodnight, Edward."

He cut his eyes to a smiling Bella and opened the door as Edward called, "Night, Charlie."

Edward ran his hand along the soft orange, and white fur on his lap as the door clicked closed. He rubbed Mischief's chin and waited for Bella to enter the kitchen. A sob brought Mischief tumbling to the floor. Edward found Bella leaning against the front door with her arms wrapped tightly around herself as her long brown hair curtained her sobs.

Edward's eyes stung as he wrapped his arms tightly around her. When she collapsed against him in sorrowful gasps, he slid his arm under her knees and cradled her against his chest as he carried her to the couch. He sat with her on his lap, and she let out an anguished cry that ushered in a new round of sobs. She cried so hard, and for so long that Edward was worried she'd make herself sick. Anger for her bastard of a father rippled under the surface, but he kept it in check and focused on Bella.

"Shhh, baby, I got you," he whispered over and over as he rocked her and soothed her wet hair from her face. "I love you, baby."

As she quieted down to sniffs, hiccoughs, and deep sighs, he knew the worst was over. He soothed her hair and rubbed her back as she sank deeper into him. With his cheek resting on her head he listened to her gentle breathing as she slept.

"He hurt me so much," she whispered startling him.

He kissed her forehead. "I'm sorry—and I'm sorry for my part in hurting you."

He felt her slender hand cup his cheek. "It did hurt when you left, but no, I always wondered why Momma never sent a card or letter. There were no birthday or Christmas presents, no phone calls—nothing."

Edward shifted her so that he could see her better.

She looked toward the door her father went through as if he was standing on the other side. "I think he did the same thing with her. I think maybe he threatened her to get her completely out of our lives."

Edward wanted to deny that possibility, but he'd been at the receiving end of Charlie Swan's manipulations.

"I don't know," she whispered and snuggled into his collar.

"Bella, look at me. I don't know either, but you're a grown woman now. The teenager at her father's mercy is gone, and a strong, self-assured woman stands in her place. I've been so proud of you today. You've been firm and brave without being bitter. You're a better person than me."

She nudged him with her shoulder. "You've been very sweet today, more than Dad deserves. I love my dad, but it'll take a while to get past this." She released a stuttered sigh. "Thank you for handling this so well. I don't know why you haven't run. There are a lot of girls who are less trouble," she said with a laugh.

Edward heard the grain of truth in her humor and adjusted his arms wrapped around her. "Bella, your dad has always been part of the package. I didn't walk away then. Charlie forced me away. I won't walk away now. I knew what I was walking into when I crossed the street to talk to you at the street fair. I knew who I was going to piss off and I knew who I hoped to impress. Your dad has no power anymore, only you. As long as you want me, I'm invincible."

"I want you," she said as she placed a delicate hand on his cheek and pressed her lips to his. He let her lead the kiss, sensing she needed to give, to show how much she meant her words. When she pulled back, he whispered, "I'm glad. I've always wanted you, only you, Bella." At that, his stomach growled.

"I promised pot roast, and all you've gotten is stale coffee and family drama."

Edward laughed as she towed him toward the kitchen. She grabbed two spatulas and lifted the lid on the slow cooker releasing a mouthwatering cloud. He laid his hand on hers, stilling her movement. "Why don't you go change and freshen up and I'll get the roast and vegetables on the plate."

She hesitated but handed the spatulas to him before scurrying up the stairs with Jangles on her heels.

Bo materialized at Edward's knee as the roast met the plate, and he pinched a juice bit off for the sweet old guy. Bo's tail thumped lazily on the cabinet as he licked his lips hoping for more.

Bella returned with sweatpants and a large shirt. With her hair piled into a messy bun and her face scrubbed clean, she looked fresh and young—huggable.

He smiled. "You're so beautiful, baby."

She ducked her head and hip-bumped him out of the way. "Thank you for helping. I just need to make the gravy, warm the biscuits, and set the table."

"I'll set the table and warm the biscuits. You work your magic with the gravy."

They moved about the kitchen with natural ease. As Edward set the table for two, he looked around the house and thought about the new Bella he was coming to know. She held much of the endearing, slightly awkward charm she had in high school, but there were differences between this woman and the girl of his memories.

His eye roamed the quiet house, with sleeping dogs and cats scattered throughout, before focusing beyond the frosted window to the dormant fruit trees and raised beds. She had built a quiet, structured life that protected her—her safe place.

Edward finished setting the table and looked up in time to see Bella giggle as she gave each of her dogs a piece of juicy fat. Bo's tail thumped the cabinet door, as Jangles performed a free-form dance next to his quiet buddy. Bella kissed each muzzle and turned back to pouring the gravy into her grandma's gravy boat. Edward felt Mischief rub against his pants leg. He liked who Bella had become and hoped she saw enough good in him to make room for him in her life. Reaching down to scratch the cat's arched back, he thought he could be happy in her world—his safe place.

…

Edward squeezed her hand as he pushed open the Cullen's front door. "Hellooo, something smells good."

Esme bustled out of the kitchen wiping her hands on a kitchen towel. "Merry Christmas!"

Bella forced herself to relax to receive Esme's embrace. "Merry Christmas, Esme."

Esme moved to hug Edward before instructing them to hang their coats on the coat hooks by the door.

"Merry Christmas, Edward, Bella."

Bella turned to smile shyly at Carlisle Cullen. "Merry Christmas, sir."

"Carlisle, please."

Bella nodded and tucked her hair behind her ear. "Merry Christmas, Carlisle."

He wrapped his arm around his wife. "I'm glad you're here. Esme wouldn't let me eat until you got here." He slapped Edward on the back and led the group into the kitchen.

Standing in the kitchen as Esme put the finishing touches on the meal, it felt good to have Edward's arm wrapped around her. She remembered being in Esme's kitchen after school and not wanting Edward to touch her in front of his family. She looked at the happy man joking with his uncle about Carlisle's lack of barbequing skills and gave a regretful sigh.

"What?" he whispered as he pulled her closer.

"I'm sorry I pushed you away so much in high school."

He frowned as he brushed her hair back from her face. "I get it, baby. You were taught not to show too much affection, and I know you were waiting for me to wake up and leave. Am I right?"

"I'm sorry." She said as she nodded against his palm.

He lifted her chin to bring her eyes to his. "But not anymore, right?"

"But not anymore," she agreed. "I like your arm around me."

He kissed her forehead. "Good, because that's where it belongs."

…

Throughout dinner and cleanup, Bella felt herself relax into the embrace of this family. She felt as if she had come over to work on homework with Edward just the other day. She had missed Esme's mothering and Carlisle's reassuring presence.

With plates of apple bread pudding and steaming mugs of coffee scattered about the room, they gathered around the elegantly decorated tree gracing the corner of the living room.

Edward sat on the floor at Bella's knees and leaned back for kisses curtained by vanilla scented brown hair.

As presents were passed around and opened, Carlisle and Esme watched the former star-crossed lovers sharing kisses and smiles. It seemed Charlie Swan's daughter complete their family circle in a way they hadn't anticipated.

Carlisle could see that he hadn't considered the depth of Edward's feelings as he had made the plans that would protect his nephew but separate the tender lovers. He was grateful for his own second chance to correct and restore the damage of his decisions in the past. Carlisle smiled as Esme dabbed a tear with her Christmas napkin and sent up a quick prayer for a peaceful future for his family.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Chapter Eight**_

Edward frantically patted his bed to find and silence his phone. He pulled it from under a pillow and stared at Bella's missed call as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. When the phone began dancing in his hand, he answered on the first ring.

Grinning, he said, "Morning, baby."

The sobbing, frantic voice had him sitting up. "Edward, I—I don't know what to do."

"What's happened?"

"Sue called. Edward, she was so furious … said Christmas was ruined. Dad called her drunk. She said he's just a mess. Should I go over there? What should I do? I don't know how to fix this."

Edward rubbed his face.

 _Damn Charlie Swan_.

"Is Sue upset with you or just your jackass of a father?" He heard her reluctant laugh and relaxed.

"Sue's disgusted with Dad. He's never gone off the rails like this. She's so good for him."

"From what I know of Charlie Swan, the woman must be a saint,"

"That doesn't help."

"… much like his daughter."

"Stop."

He could hear the smile in Bella's reprimand.

"Okay, let me think." He swung his feet to the floor and rubbed a hand through his rumpled hair. "Stay put, call Sue, and plan to go over with Charlie in the afternoon. Give him some time to get himself together. Christmas doesn't have to be canceled, just postponed."

Her relief rang through the phone. "Okay, that sounds good." With a lighter tone, she added, "I'll bake a chocolate mint pie. That's a Christmas favorite for Sue."

"That sounds perfect, baby. I'll call you in a bit. Call me anytime."

"Thanks. I'm so glad you're here."

Edward snorted. "Seeing as how I'm the one who stirred the shit pot until it boiled over, you probably should be throwing another shoe at me."

"I love you, Edward Cullen—and merry Christmas."

"I love you, Bella Swan, and that's all I need for Christmas. We'll talk soon, and by talk, I mean kiss a lot."

He smiled as he heard her laughter before the call disconnected. The smile faded as he dialed a new number. "Carlisle, I need your help."

Three men huddled on Charlie Swan's front porch.

"Knock again, son," Carlisle said as he stomped his feet to keep warm.

Edward leaned forward and knocked louder before slipping his hand back into his warm pocket.

Bob Banner pulled his scarf away from his mouth. "Charlie, this is Pastor Banner, can you answer the door? We're freezing out here."

The door cracked open to reveal a bleary-eyed Chief of Police. "Pastor—what you doin' here?"

Pastor Banner tucked his hands under his armpits and shifted from foot to foot. "Well, the Cullens were concerned about you and invited me to come along to see you. How are you, Charlie? Merry Christmas, by the way."

Charlie took in the three freezing men and slowly grasped the situation. He opened the door enough to allow entrance, and Pastor Banner led the way to warmth like Moses through the Red Sea.

"I don't know what would have you out in such weather to check on me—on Christmas day." He plopped down in his recliner. "Christmas!" Thoughts of a convoluted phone conversation with Sue fogged his mind, and he rubbed his face. "I've messed up." He looked up into Edward's eyes as Pastor Banner, and Carlisle sat on the lumpy couch.

"Yes sir, Sue called Bella."

Charlie grimaced. "And Bella called you."

Edward lifted his chin and said, "Yes sir." before leaving the room.

Charlie closed his eyes and nodded as Carlisle leaned forward to set a plastic container and a thermos on the coffee table.

"Chief Swan, my wife sent homemade cinnamon rolls and Café Du Monde with chocolate. Merry Christmas."

Charlie tried to clear his liquor-soaked mind and grasp a hold on the fast-paced conversation. "Ah, that sounds good, Carlisle. Um, call me Charlie."

Edward could be heard rummaging in the cabinets of Charlie's kitchen and returned with plates, fork, and mugs.

Carlisle smiled with a nod. "Bob, could you pour for us."

"I'd be glad to," Pastor Banner said as he scooted to the edge of his seat.

Charlie fought the pounding in his head as the two men busied themselves with food and coffee. Charlie reached for the coffee set before him and closed his eyes as his body accepted the hot caffeine into his battered system. "Ah, that's good," he groaned.

Edward wanted to pace, to turn violence on this man, but his father motioned for him to sit, and as he obeyed, he saw Charlie Swan for what he was—a toothless old lion fighting to keep his pride.

Edward cleared his throat. "Chief Swan, Bella is worried about you. She's worried her relationship with me is damaging her relationship with you and your relationship with Sue. She feels—guilty."

Pastor Banner sat forward to step into the conversation, but Charlie held up his hand to stop him as he leaned forward to set his mug on the coffee table. The three men watched Charlie study his work-worn hands, listening to the rasp as they shifted over each other, and waited.

In time, he looked up and focused just over Edward's left shoulder. "I can mess things up on my own and obviously have." He sighed deeply before shifting his eyes to Edward. "I need to know you're not going to hurt her again."

Edward stiffened. _Hurt her again? It was his doing that hurt her in the first place_.

Carlisle's hand came to rest on his son's forearm. Edward closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Sir, I'm here to stay, and I think Bella's happiness is the one thing we can agree on. I've never hurt her intentionally, and I never will."

Charlie nodded, picked up his mug and took a sip as he leaned back. "I appreciate you men coming to check on me. It goes a long way in showing me your concern for Bella."

"And for you, Charlie," Carlisle said.

Charlie nodded and looked down at his hand turned his mug on his knee. "I appreciate that, Carlisle. If you don't mind, I'll hold onto Pastor Banner for a bit and run him home on the way to Sue's." Charlie looked up, and Bob nodded. Charlie's eyes rested on Edward. "You'll make sure Bella gets over to Sue's?"

Edward swallowed thickly, feeling how hard this must be for the Chief. "Yes sir, we'll be there. Bella's already baking a pie for Sue to sweeten the deal."

Charlie smiled softly, "No sweetening necessary. Sue loves her, and for some reason the woman loves me. She'll be glad we're there." He patted his hand nervously on his knee and forced himself to add. "I'm—sure she'll be thrilled that the family circle is expanding to include you."

Bella fidgeted nervously in the cab of Edward's truck. He placed his hand on her knee to calm her. "Bella, your dad is fine. A little hung over and embarrassed at having to eat crow with both of his women on Christmas day, but he's fine."

Bella squeezed his hand over her knee and continued to hold it tight. "Thanks, I don't want to hurt him, but dammit, I want to be happy—with you."

"You are with me. We are happy, and after today, Charlie will see that this is good for you and rest in that. He may never like me, but we've come to stand on common ground," Edward said as he pulled up a gravel drive and threw the truck in park."

"What's the common ground?"

He leaned over and kissed her sweetly. "You."

Sue's door flew open as Bella, Edward and bags of presents marched up the steps of the front porch. A radiant Sue ushered in the couple, and a somber Charlie reached around the hugging women to take the bags from Edward.

Bella found Charlie fussing over presents under the tree and surprised him with a hug and a kiss on his cheek. Sue placed her hand on Edward's shoulder, and they watched the father and daughter have an unspoken conversation that ended in a long, forgiving hug. He realized a part of him had always wanted to rescue Bella and bring her into the loving safety of his family. Now, Edward knew he wanted to be absorbed into the love of this family.

At that moment, Edward knew the war was over for him. He patted Sue's hand on his shoulder and moved into the room to join them.

After a delicious dinner and invasive questions from Sue, Charlie called Bella into one of the back rooms. Bella took Edward's hand and towed him into the small bedroom-turned-office and paused in front of her dad, who was holding a mobile phone against his chest.

"I'm not going to apologize for protecting you, Bella," Charlie began as he flicked his eyes to Edward and sighed, resigned. As his eyes rested back on Bella, he continued, "But I'm not going to stand in the way of you having who you want in your life." His eyes shimmered with unshed tears as he continued. "You are the joy of my life. I'm so proud of who you've become, and I trust your judgment more than anyone in the world." A tear betrayed him by rolling down his leathered cheek as he shoved the phone into his daughter's hand and walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Bella looked from the phone to Edward, who shrugged and gave her a reassuring smile. She held his eyes as she brought the phone to her ear.

"H-Hello?"

A voice, an echo from Bella's memories, carried through the phone line. "Bella-boo, is that you?"


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Bella's face crumbled as a sob escaped her. Edward drew her to an old, sagging couch along the wall and with Edward's arm wrapped around her, she found her voice. "Mama?"

"Oh, baby! I'm so glad to hear your voice. What a wonderful Christmas present. How are you? Are you happy? You're twenty-seven. Are you married? Charlie would never tell me anything about you. I've missed you."

Overwhelmed, Bella looked at Edward. "Ask her, baby," he said, "It's time."

Bella took several breaths and holding Edward's gaze she spoke into the phone. "Why did you leave, Mama?"

Silence at the other end had Bella holding her breath.

"I—Bella, I messed up so badly. I wasn't happy back then. I felt trapped in that small-town life. I always wanted you. You have to know that, but I never wanted that life. Shopping in Seattle, I met Cameron Tanner. He made me laugh and feel pretty. I could forget my dowdy old life when I was with him. He introduced me to drugs, and I thought it was all very glamorous and romantic. I thought I was in love with him and when he asked me to move to Phoenix with him, I was planning on taking you with me." A sob echoed over the line before she continued with a bitter tone to her story. "Charlie found the drugs in my car and used it against me to leave you with him. I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry. I knew as soon as I left you that what I had with Cam wasn't love, but I was hooked and couldn't face Charlie in my shame."

Bella's sobs had Edward take the phone from Bella's shaking hand. "Ma'am, this is Edward Cullen, Bella's boyfriend. She's going to take a moment to gather herself."

A nose blowing had him pull his ear away from the phone, but he smiled when Bella laughed through her tears. She reached for the tissue box on the desk and wiped her face and nose.

Edward handed the phone to her with a kiss on her forehead. She took a cleansing breath before putting the phone to her ear and leaned closer to him allowing him to hear both sides.

"Mama, I missed you … or maybe the idea of you. I don't really know you as a person."

"Do—do you want to know me?" desperation crept into her mother's voice as she continued." I—I'm better now. I've been clean and sober for six years now. I met Phil Dwyer, pitcher for the Tampa Tarpons." She laughed. "He's just a crazy health freak. He loves me. We've been married for three years and live in Tampa." Her voice faded. "I really am much better."

Bella smiled through her tears. "I'm happy for you, Mama." She sniffed. "Yes, I want to know you. I'm happy too."

"A boyfriend?" her mom teased.

Bella grinned at Edward. "Yeah, I've loved him most of my life."

Edward kissed her forehead.

"I'm so glad, baby. Everyone should have that kind of love in their life."

The two women sighed, and then laughed in tandem. "Merry Christmas, Mama. I'm going to let you go, but I'd like to call you later tonight when we can talk more."

"Oh, I'd like that, Bella-boo. I love you."

Bella's lips spread into a soft, sentimental smile. "I-I love you too … Mama Boo."

She ended the call and dropped the phone in her lap. Silence filled the room as she stared at the white wall across from her. "I never thought I'd hear from her again," she whispered.

Edward kissed her forehead. "It's great to know she's doing so well," he offered.

"Yeah, I don't know how to feel. On the one hand, it's a dream come true to hear my mama's voice again. On the other, she's a stranger. I don't know how much I want her in my life."

"Talking with her on the phone will help bridge the gap, I think. Take it at your own pace," Edward said as he drew her snug against himself.

They sat in quiet thought as Edward's hand soothed up and down her arm.

In time, her whisper shattered their silence. "Charlie was right to separate me from her. You know he never bad mouthed her. He just made it clear she wouldn't be back."

Edward sat forward and rested their joined hands on his knee. "I'm grateful he stopped you from being dragged into that life." He lifted her hand to his lips and murmured against her knuckles, "I understand why he overreacted that night with me."

She rested her cheek on his shoulder. "I'm sorry for that."

Edward turned to look at her forcing her to sit up. "I love you. You know that, right?"

She smiled softly and rested her hand on his cheek, "Yes, you've always loved me."

He leaned into her touch. "Always—and I'd never hurt you, Bella."

She pressed her lips to his. "I know now you never have, and I know you never will."

With a sigh, he pulled her back with him and wrapped her snug in his arms. She draped her legs over his lap and turned to rest her cheek on his chest.

"We're going to be fine," he murmured against her hair.

She slipped two fingers between his shirt's buttons to find a patch of smooth skin. "We're going to be legendary," she said and smiled as his laughter rumbled under her cheek.

Bella and Edward found Sue washing dishes and talking up a storm as Charlie quietly dried the dishes she handed him. Bella walked behind her dad and wrapped her arms around his torso and rested her head against his broad back. He stilled and patted her hands on his stomach. When he turned and hugged her, she whispered into his flannel shirt. "Thank you for protecting me—and thank you for letting her try again." Charlie cleared his throat and pulled back. She looked into her father's shimmering eyes. "And thank you for accepting Edward. I'm … happy."

He nodded and closed his eyes resting his cheek on the top of her head. "Pastor Banner showed me how it was time to make things right," he said as he swayed with her.

Edward stepped around them and took up the dish towel Charlie had abandoned and received the plate Sue handed him as she nudged her shoulder against his arm.

Gathered around the little tree in the corner of the living room, the small group quietly shared their presents while enjoying coffee and Bella's chocolate pie. The time was quiet, blanketed with a contentment found in having the past laid to rest.

"Dog treats—really, Dad?" Bella said as she stripped away the silver paper.

Charlie frowned in mock dismay. "Those dogs don't need the dollar store snacks."

Edward and Sue laughed as Bella clicked her tongue. "You'd have those dogs eating Kobe steaks if you had your way."

Charlie sniffed. "Maybe they should just come live with Grandpa."

"I don't think so. You'd spoil them so much you'd have to get a second job."

Sue leaned between them to hand Edward his present effectively stopping their banter.

Edward sat the box on his knees noting the tag declaring it from Charlie and Sue with a note in feminine script added at the bottom— _Grateful at Christmas and Hopeful in the New Year. Merry Christmas._ He looked up. "Thank you, Sue—Charlie."

Charlie shifted in his seat, and Sue patted his thigh and said, "Open it," as she winked at Bella.

Edward pulled back the paper and opened the present. He glanced at Bella who smiled.

With a happy voice, Sue added, "Bella helped me find it. She said you wore one like that in high school."

Edward grinned as he pulled a denim jacket from the box, "Yeah Bella liked my blue jean jacket."

Charlie sat forward. "That ratty old jacket was his?"

Bella shot him a vindictive grin. "Yeah, he left it with me. It's all I had of him."

Edward glanced at a flushed Bella. "You kept it?"

Charlie answered for her. "She wore that ratty old jacket for years. I had no idea …"

"I still have it," Bella said with a small, defiant lift of her chin.

Edward looked at the regret washing over the older man's face and stood to model it for the women in the hope of distracting them away from Charlie's pain. "Are you going to let me wear this one, you pretty, little thief?" Edward asked.

The women laughed, and Bella ran her hand down his sleeve. "I suppose, for now."

Sue bustled out of the kitchen with Tupperware containers of leftovers as the young couple bundled up for the cold night. Charlie stood with his hands in his pockets and watched as Edward helped Bella with her coat before gathering up all of the bags to take out to the car.

Sue handed the food to Bella and gave her a hug. "Merry Christmas, sweet girl."

As she turned to Edward, Bella hugged her father tightly. Edward thought she looked like the little girl he grew up with as she snuggled into her father's arms. He smiled tenderly and turned his attention to Sue. "Thank you for having me, Sue."

She hugged him with enthusiasm. "You're welcome here anytime, Edward and we'll see you New Year's Eve, if not sooner."

Bella pulled away from her father to rejoin Edward by the door. "What's New Year's Eve?"

Sue smiled brightly, "Edward's Aunt called to let us know you were coming today and invited Charlie and me to their party. It's semi-formal," she squealed.

A groan came from Charlie's direction, and Bella and Sue laughed at his misery as Sue open the door for them.

All the way down the driveway, Bella waved at Charlie standing under the porch light with his arm around Sue.

As they pulled out onto the street, Edward reached for her hand and asked, "Why'd you stop wearing the jacket if you kept it?"

Bella sighed as she slid her fingers between his and brought their hands to rest on her knee. "I don't want to bring up bad memories tonight, but I finally figured, for whatever reason, you weren't coming back. My memories became so precious and private I couldn't share even the jacket with the outside world." She shrugged and covered their hands with her other hand, warming them.

"I kept the spirit ribbon that you put in my locker, the one with your kiss print on it." He squeezed her hand, " I carried it in my pocket until it was frayed. I still have it." He said as they pulled in front of her house and he turned off the engine.

They sat, lost in their thoughts until the night's chill began to seep into the truck's cab.

"Come on, let's get you inside," Edward said.

"Can you come in for a bit?" She asked shyly.

He leaned over to press his lips to hers. "I'd love to—for a bit." Opening his door, he said, "I want to see if the guys like Charlie's fancy snacks."

Bella smacked his arm, and he laughed as he made his way around to open her door. When she stood, he wrapped his arm around her slender waist and pulled her to him. "I love you, baby. This has been the best Christmas of my life."

Bella ran her hands up his arms, "Even with my drunk daddy?"

He grinned. "I'm human enough to have enjoyed watching him squirm like a bug on a hot griddle this morning." He tucked a windblown strand of her hair behind her ear and continued, "But, no, I'm just damn thankful to have a second chance with you."

A shiver ran through her, and he blocked the wind with his body as he escorted her to the front porch. The dogs' loud ruckus sent Mischief flying under the couch, and as Edward rubbed old Bo's ears, he felt for the first time since his parents died the feeling of home soak into the marrow of his bones. He looked at the little brunette who was laughing at Jangles curiosity over the presents and swallowed thickly.

Bella had always been his home.


End file.
